Wednesday, January 23, 2019

The Next Epistle of Saint Zern




1  

1      And they did continue to dwell among the eagles and racoons in the land of Florida Central, having fought the good fight against the state taxation found in the land of Carolina in the north country, finding it grievous. And they did rejoice in a land both warm and cheap.
2       And thus, we see that Sherwood and Linda did endeavor to live as goodly parents and doting grandparents in the land with no state income tax.
3       And it was done with good intent, whilst they did binge on Netflix and the like.
4      Furthermore, it was with great happiness that they did, in the year of our Lord, 2018, count among their greatest gifts and blessings the children that they did count as grand. And Phillip and Heather begat Zoe and Conner and Kipling and Zachary and Griffin and even one more, Ender. His name being that of a character in a most excellent book.
5      Maren and Thomas begat Reagan and Hero and Leidy and Boone the Baby pants.
6      To them also did Adam and Sarah count Emma and Sadie and Scout and the youngest of them, Ever Jane, who did vex many with her dislike of the chamber pot; however, much she did smile and show forth much spunkiness.
7       And in the land northward, a land of much snow and cucumbers, they did see Aric and Lauren bring forth both Silas and Ellie.
8       And it was like a tribe of old that did grow and prosper and become both fair and delightsome.
9      And so, there was the giving of great thanks.
10    And the honor was Poppy’s, who was both adored and admired by the children he found grand and who did arrive daily asking, where doth Poppy dwell and is there Pepsi and candy?
11    But behold, YaYa did impose the rule of law, and receiveth much in the way of deathly looks and muttered curses, but she doth continue to hold high the standards of truth and meanness.
12   But it came to pass that YaYa did both rule and reign and bring forth collections of her words, arranged in blocks called paragraphs, numbered on pages, bound up in books called novels. And she did continue forth writing much, yea even a great number of volumes which can be found at a place called amazon.com/author/lindazern 
13   And now, it came to pass in the fortieth year of their being wedded that Sherwood and Linda did continue in this vein, sitting much in the afternoon and evening gathered about a pot of fire recounting the days of their youth and silliness. And they did laugh much at the memories and silliness.
14   And they caused that their family did stand in readiness, lest they be caught flat of foot in the last days. 
15   And I make an end.     
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