"WICKED"

I dislike the musical “Wicked.” Really. Really.

I know. I know. I’m the only one. But to me, the message that society made her wicked because she was a weird color and smart is so blah, blah, blah. Everyone else did this to me, so I’m going to go steal my sister’s boyfriend—blah, blah, blah. I’ll show them wicked. Blah. Blah. Blah. Cue the spectacular production number and the flying monkeys. 

Listen up! I grew up in a house with a drinker, and drinking made him turn green—metaphorically speaking—and when he turned green he was wicked. I’m pretty sure that he had a million reasons to turn green. Blah. Blah. Blah. In the end, it doesn’t matter because the results were the same. Misery begets pain and pain begets hurt and hurt becomes misery, and yes everyone IS a hypocrite and round and round you go until someone drops a house on you. 

But you know what you get when everyone feels they have an excuse for why they can’t, won’t, don’t choose the right (and I mean right as in ***righteous or better, a better way to live) you get a world where you have to chain up your neighborhoods and password your life. 

If there is no “right” way to live and be happy then be prepared. 

Be prepared for people to feel justified in trying to steal your income tax return—three times. 

Be prepared for people to order a thousand dollar television in your husband’s name, have it delivered to your house, and then charge you for it. The television went back.

Get ready for the endless passwords that you will not be able to remember but have to have to keep trillions of greedy hackers from stealing your special little numbers.

Don’t be shocked when folks attempt to use your husband’s credit card to buy leopard skin boots—size infant.

Be prepared for wicked—self-righteous wicked.

According to all the studies and research and musicals, I should be green and wicked and drunk. But I’m not. I found a better way. I chose a better way. There is a better way. I don’t feel strong. I feel stubborn. And anyone can be stubborn.

Linda (Designated Driver) Zern 

***NOTE: I know. I know. The word righteous has become synonymous with the concept of self-righteousness which is bad, but that’s not what the word means. Righteous means choosing a better way despite society or jealousy of your beautiful, ditzy sister. It doesn’t mean getting even.